Some never meet their Hero's, I grew up with mine.

The greatest gift of what has been this journey of mine, has been to form an even stronger bond with my father and mother , a relationship built around honesty, comfortability & understanding. 
I believe through what I have experienced and lived through over 8 years has brought us closer together in which I am so grateful for.
I've been able to watch them evolve just as much as I have. From what I use to feel was a lack of understanding, had made it quite difficult for me to talk to them and be open about what I was living through. 
Now, I can be a complete open book, they are first to know when my chronic suicidal thoughts get heavier, they hear when I'm sick from medications, they can tell when I'm drained and exhausted. It's the most crucial part for me. They are my supports and journeys like this can't be taken alone. That's where the damage is done, when feelings are surpressed and thoughts are bottled up. 
Mum & Dad are just as important and involved in what I do with Mindfull aus as anyone else.
The significance  of having parents that support what I do, have a better understanding of what I among many others experience has been so beneficial to each of my recoveries after suicide attempts and also in me managing day to day, living with Bipolar. 

At the start was so difficult and uncomfortable because I had this sense of being ashamed and a burden on them. Those are the last thoughts that have been through my head prior to an attempt, but I was never alone or unloved. The truth was, they always cared and were there for me, I just couldn't see it. 

After being overseas and speaking to and engaging in conversations over here, the same common questions pop up that do when I speak in Australia. Those that refer to not being comfortable speaking up to their parents or that of the parents not taking these thoughts, feelings and ideations seriously. 

I want to use this piece to challenge parents or carers, YOU are the single most important person to your children. Having the understanding around brain pain is detrimental to maintaining these conversations, along with the reflex head nod as it tells me you are listening. I know if it wasn't for my parents I wouldn't be here. Yes, I would be gone! 
Both through my time in Queensland, being taken off the street by Aurora Alexander who was my mum away from home and prior to leaving Victoria and returning with my parents Andrew & Louise Runnalls. 

They have actively involved themselves in several events, which gives me great pride that they are doing something left of field and possibly out of their comfort, to ensure I live well and am safe. 
Please to the parents and carers out there, do not take this for granted or ignore the importance of your role in recovery and healing. 
I have a huge gratitude for what I have been through. Many parts of my journey, many attributes and growth within myself wouldn't of changed without these experiences, I know it hasn't been easy for my parents and I'll never be proud of what I've put them through over the course. 
But... what I do know is that through their continual love & support I become a better person and have been given an opportunity at life I should never of had. The opportunity now to give back for the pain I've caused, to make them proud and become someone who continually contributes to society.

Be that love & support for your children. Be the reason they wake up tommorow with Hope to continue on amongst the darkest thoughts and feelings. You have the ability through a basic understanding to be the change your kids need and there is nothing more beautiful, noble and rewarding than to see someone you love SMILE. 

My parents may well kick my ass for this,  but I know other parents out there will find hope in how they have handled our situation to reach out to their kids and make a change and those who are struggling right now might build the courage in their journey to do as I did and turn to those that are closest to you. 

I love my parents. Mum, Dad & Aurora ❤️

Be mindful of those with a mindFULL. 💚

Matt RunnallsComment